soapboxdiner

Fuck All.

I texted Wood tonight that I think we are better off as friends. He texted back that he's given it some thought, and he agrees.

Dammit.

I hate that shit. Now I feel all rejected and destined to be alone forever and ever - The End.

Oh, well. Such is life. Bad timing.

I made him absolutely know that he's supposed to want me desperately. He assured me that I've made him abundantly aware that he felt before he met me that he was ready for a relationship. But after meeting me, he now knows that he has a lot to accomplish in himself before he can give what he wants to be able to give to a relationship.

Puke! Bullshit! Get over yourself, Wood! You aren't convincing anyone that you aren't a great guy with a lot to offer, if you'd just relax and let go of the "Supposed to be's". News flash, brainiac, WE ALL ARE SUPPOSED TO BE'S!

Can't convince him of that though.

Fuck me. God, I hate being smart and intuitive and insightful sometimes. All I fucking want is ...

Fuck it. Whatever. That is a dangerous sentence, and in this instance, it doesn't really account for much anyways. I can "fucking want" all I want, but it isn't convincing him that we could have a good thing if he'd just let cut himself some slack, relax, and enjoy every single moment of it, in the moment, without concern that it distracts him from one damn thing of importance.

In other news, I met with the CEO and Director at work yesterday. They rejected my proposal to use the microsoft curriculum for the Employee Development Program. Instead, they've had me sign up for the microsoft courses, instructed me to take copious and detailed notes, and then they want me to develop my own curriculum for the program. It's a huge opportunity, and will develop me in areas that I have never been given chance at before. Only I have about three other major projects that I have to complete at the same time and I'm hourly, so I'm not supposed to take any of it home to complete. Only I'm going to, because that's the way I roll, and I'm gonna blow their fucking minds at my awesomeness. Why? Because I'm a fucking all star.

Just ask Wood. He'll tell you . . . as he's out doing shots of tequila and "Working on making himself better."

7:54 pm - 03.04.08
previous | next

Home | Archives | Profile | Notes | DiaryLand | Random Entry