soapboxdiner


This angry, frustrated and rejected rant brought to you by your friends at the Dow Corning Poison & Pesticide Co.



Last night I was watching That 70s Show and Donna and whathisname were having a discussion. They would say *whatever* and then it would flash subtitles at the bottom telling you what *whatever* really meant, deciphered out of date speak. "You don't mind if I go out with the guys tomorrow night, do you?" meant, "Are you pissed at me?" and "No, not at all. Go ahead and have fun with your friends." meant, "You will never see me naked again."

Tonight I had one of those with Marcus. I don't know why I call him. I really don't. He doesn't call me. He will return MY calls. He will email me but he - not once - has called me out of the blue just because he was thinking of me.

So we were chatting and he says, "So any hot dates coming up? No? Any cold dates coming up?"

He knows I like him. If he doesn't, he's a fool. Sure, it soulds like all I want from him is superficial here, but the truth is, I like his mind. I like the way he thinks. I want to know more about it, I want to talk about it. Etc etc etc. All that gooey stuff everyone understands but couldn't give two flips over when it's occurring in anyone but themselves.

I ask him over to share the wine he brought me and he said, "You haven't drank it yet? Drink it. I bought it for you so you could have yourself a bottle of wine. Alone. What - you want me to come over and drink it with you? I'll come over and drink it with you... sometime. When I'm not busy. I've been very busy."

Well fuck you very much, Marcus. Don't bother. If fitting a glass of wine with me into your schedule is a bother - by all means, stay home - or out - or where ever it is that you find yourself. The very last thing I want to be is an unwanted obligation you feel you HAVE to squeeze in. I'm worth a hell of a lot more than that and dammit, even if I'm the only one who knows it, that's still one person who won't treat me like a flea on a dog's dick.



9:59 pm - 04.29.03
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