soapboxdiner

Vampiric bastards getting the hook up

What do you get when you cross Staphylococcus aureus (the first superbug to become completely resistant to antibiotics) and that movie from the early 80s about the house that killed its inhabitants?

I will tell you what you get when you cross Staph a. and that movie that killed granny by boiling her in the swimming pool. You get my house and fleas. Every summer - fleas. Every summer - spent any place other than my house because of flea bombing. Not that it does me any good because the little buggers just kick back on the couch, turn on Animal Planet and toss down a couple beers. I try to kill them, really I do. But they laugh at me. Taunt me. They don't die. They just wait for me to come home so they can eat me. Vampiric little bastards!

The radio station in my city does this feature. This incredibly funny, funny feature involving personal ads, phony pictures of a beautiful woman and said woman telling the responders, "Write me something that will make you stand out from the pack." Oh, the things men will do.

Though I am generally opposed to stringing along others and playing with emotions... I'm liking this idea immensely for the sheer humor value.

I sense a Soapbox Special Feature coming. Wanna play along?

8:37 am - 07.27.02
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