soapboxdiner

Ms. SBD if you're nasty

Tonight I was cruising around diaryland and came across a new (for me) diarist. Reading through a paragraph or two, I got a shot of adrenaline and felt all butterfly-y in my tummy and got terribly, terribly excited. I know this person. This is my long lost Diaryland friend who disappeared! I thought to myself.

And then I thought why did she change diaries and not tell any of us? Did she stop loving us? Where things just bad then, and she didn't want to express that badness in her diary anymore? Did she want to write, but not as that person? She didn't want us knowing the new her?

And it made me sad. I miss my friend, but she is gone.

Anyway, the new girl (who happens to be of the same name as the old) is not who I thought she was. Or at least the life she details is not the life of my friend. But I think I'll add her to my buddy list all the same.

p.s. Don't you hate it when you lose touch with people you love?

p.p.s. Don't you hate it when people who used to be your friends drop all contact with you via phone, letters, email, AIM, whathaveyou, - make a point of taking you off their buddylist - but then bookmark your site and read you everyday? What is that? Some sort of non-acknowledgement of their abiding love/hate? Doesn't that make you just want to say, "I know you read me, so you might as well just re-add me to your favorites and be done with it. What, you have a sick fascination with me? You don't like me, but you just have to follow what I think and write? You know you love me. And guess what? I know it, too."

Because I'm full of myself like that. But at least I freely admit it, rather than delude myself with a facade of my own creation.

Ho hum. That was nasty of me, wasn't it? Why yes, I do believe it was.

10:38 pm - 12.29.02
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