soapboxdiner

Freak Show

It gets stranger and stranger.

So here I am, all happy and shit. Content, I believe is the word. I've managed to make enough money to pay rent for the first time in three months (luckily my land lady could give a rat's ass about rent, none of it goes into her checkbook. As a matter of fact, she gets - and gives - nothing from "managing" this property.) Also high on the cool list is that I narrowly avoided having the power cut off, and the phone (crucial to my sanity, not for the pleasure of speaking regularly into it, but for the internet access, darlings) is paid as well.

All in all, I'm feeling pretty damned good about being a responsible, bill paying grown-up again. This feeling, however, is subject to change and probably will the next time I sit down with the monthly bills, a stiff Jack Daniels, some tissue, and the checkbook.

And so it goes. Me of all people, feeling at peace in my world. So what happens? The only thing that could, naturally.

I got a call regarding a job lead. Working with my mother. Stage left to the phone call.

Mom: Hi honey. How was your day at work?

Me: Fine, Mom. Good. And your's?

Mom: Same as always. It was hell. So, we're looking for a new records manager at work. My boss asked if you'd like to interview. Would you be okay with working with your mom? I can be a tyrant, you know.

Me: That's okay, Mom. I can be a passive-agressive vengeful bitch. I think we'd compliment each other nicely.

Mom: Well, The Boss asked if you're better now.

Me: Better? As opposed to what, Mother?

Mom: Well, The Boss knows about your past and that you've had a tough year, emotionally speaking.

Me: Mother. mothermothermother. Firstly, thank you for sharing the job lead. Secondly, exactly which "emotional problems" of mine did you share? And whose definition are we using for the terms "problems" and "emotions"? Because honestly, I don't classify the last year with those terms. As a matter of fact, I've felt stronger and better this year than I have in a long time. Thirdly, do you honestly think I would feel comfortable going in to interview with a woman who you've convinced of my need for institutionalization?

Mom: But I've told her you're much better now!

Me: Mom. Seriously.

Mom: Really, honey. It's okay. She just asked if you'd be flaky and walk out on the job. But I told her you're better now.

Me: Mother, I've never walked out on a job in my life. For her to even consider me, I'd have to not only convince her that I'm qualified, but I'd have to dispel her presumption that I'm a freak show. Not to mention, what I do in my personal life is completely separate from anything I do professionally. I do know the difference.

Mom: Honey, will you drop it? Her family has some dark spots too. She won't hold your past against you.

Me: So I'm a dark spot? Why exactly am I colored a dark spot?

Mom: Oh, just quit. You're making too much of this. She knows you did some crazy things last spring. February is just a bad month for you. You've had a couple bad Februarys, dear. But I'll be there to help you.

People. I have no words for this episode. Oh wait, yes I do: Perposterous, absurd, laughably insulting. I could go on and on. But I think I'll just laugh instead that my mother cannot grasp the magnitude of her insinuations.

9:11 pm - 12.04.02
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