soapboxdiner

The Oscar Meyer Song

Speaking of Jack in the Box, here's a real hooter. One of my favorite memories, really. Now it isn't a memory of any good deed, accomplishment or reward. It wasn't a landmark moment in my life. It is simply what it is, a moment of sheer freedom in the moment - a going with it, if you will.

Now as you can imagine, working for a fast food restaurant really takes just about zero brain power for the person of even marginal intelligence. Frequently, many of us simply set ourselves on auto-pilot, even during the the slow times. Rush hours could be tricky, as there is an inordinate amount of coordination that must occur to get things to run smoothly, whether or not an uniniated might recognize and respect the fact - which is evidenced by those times when you sit, parked and waiting, in the drive-through for 15 minutes for that diet coke and small fry you ordered.

Yes, lots to do, none of which really takes much brains. Rather boring type of work to perform, don't you agree? Yes. And so, to alleviate some of that boredom, we used to invent things to do or discuss. Kind of an "I Spy" philosophy for those helplessly trapped behind a counter.

And there we were, on the particular day relevant to this discussion, playing our game. Today's topic: The Oscar Meyer Weiner Song - how did it really go. Fun stuff, right there, and many a valiant effort was made to correctly sing the song in its intirety. A prize of an extra 15 minute break to the winner! Unfortunately, no one could think of the whole blasted song. That is, not until the boss came in, the next day.

"I've got it!" he says. "Come, sing with me!"

My bologna has a first name, it's Oscar. My bologna has a second name, it's Meyer...

I can't remember the next line. And this is the crux of the issue. Oh, I could bring it home, sure. Remember the middle? I don't think so.

And Bruce the boss comes in and says, "My bologna has a first name, it's O-s-c-a-r.
My bologna has a second name, it's M-e-y-e-r
I'd love to be an Oscar Meyer wiener,
and if you ask me why I'll sayyyyyy.
Cuz Oscar meyer's found a way
of fucking up your D N A!"

Which was probably a lot funnier with the tune and musical accompaniment of the time.

Okay. Well, I'm stretching now into that vast realm of Had To Be There.

Oh well. I'll go now, and just get ready for work.

6:11 am - 12.02.02
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