soapboxdiner

Mutinous Breasts

Breasts are lovely things. Breasts have many fans. If breasts were a sports team or a political entity, they would most certainly always be the winners. Nay! If breasts were people, they would by mutinous, lumbering scallywags. Some might find these two descriptions in opposition. Allow me to make the correlation for you.

Winners and mutinous, lumbering scallywags are always smug and overbearing and pretentious. Do you see the similarities now? Do you!?

This declaration of venomous loathing has been brought to you by way of my breasts, a week-three estrogen surge, and caffiene addiction.

But on a gentler more peaceful note, I should like to auction off my breasts, to give them away with much fanfare and joy to the highest bidder. If you have need or desire for breasts, bid I say! BID BID BID! Ride that bidding frenzy like a cowgirl slapping her mount's ass all the way out of town!

Please, somebody (or some buddy), take my breasts.

6:57 am - 02.17.03
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