soapboxdiner

Green Acres

Just finished painting a "mural" on my bedroom wall.

Wanna see it?

Color me tres proud of me! The photo of it kinda sucks a lot and doesn't really show the color or details, but what are ya gonna do?

Life continues to me life-y.

Living with a 4-year-old makes me remember why I only procreated one time. Perhaps that has more to do with absence of parental attachment to the small ball of joy, but more so it's probably just because he screams down the hall over.and.over.again with his Tonka truck and stops just shy of getting drop kicked.

Reading Hippoclytus' Refutation of All Heresies and the Naassene Sermon in a book called Gnostic Secrets of the Naassenes: The Initiatory Teachings of the Last Super. Totally stoked.

I've been daydreaming lately about leaving this rat race for the simple life. Funny, because I work in an industry that is littered with women who work part time, spending the remainder of their time doing -- I don't know -- THINGS THEY LIKE TO DO.

Know what funny about that? We as women are so . . . smug and superior. Stay-at-home moms are so often, "Oh, you're OK with letting other people raise your child? That's so progressive of you. Good for you for working instead of taking care of your child and making sure s/he gets a good foundation." Working mothers retort, "And you! What a great life YOU must have! Popping Valium all day so you can forget all about that whole OK with being dependent on your spouse thing. Completely having no drive or motivation of your own outside of driving the kids to soccer practice, sacrificing all the hard work and stress of a day job so you can sit around eating bon bons and making sure you have dinner on the table and your husband thoroughly sexed so he doesn't leave you high and dry to take care of the kids with no job skills of your own. You're so courageous!"

A bunch of bitches, we can be. But the funny thing is, more and more I look at my position . . . And I think to myself, "What tangeable legacy am I leaving that's so important here? All the time and mental energy invested . . . for what? Is this adding to my happiness? It certainly isn't adding to my wealth. What would be so wrong with downsizing and doing something that I enjoy?"

What WOULD be wrong with that? And why exactly is there a stigma attached to prioritizing happiness above wealth?

So that's what I've been thinking about, as I upgrade my internet service and work extra overtime to pay off credit card charges for items I don't even remember buying.

7:25 pm - 02.08.10
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