soapboxdiner

Inherent

I open your emails sometimes at work and I feel so blase about them. They feel rushed and unconsidered and centered on the one topic I both love and hate to discuss. There is no deeper connection in them, just tales regaling me with Yr hot! Sometimes I wonder if for you, that's extent of what we are.

But then again, sometimes I wonder if that is more a reflection of my perceptions from previous experiences haunting me and taunting me into waivering bouts of doubt.

And you come over and we set in the evening air, watching the sky fade to purplish blue black beautiful. You stroke my hand with your fingers and I absently rub your feet with mine. Intertwined. And you listen as I release all the things that pound against my brain all day. You say the perfect things that make it all feel OK.

Then at night as we lay together, your skin touches my skin and your face hovers over mine. I ask you if you think you'll fall in love with me one day. You reply, "What makes you think I haven't already?" I ask you if you think you'll love me enough to make me believe it's true. Why are you here with me? You tell me because I'm always happy to see you, I accept you, I feel like home.

And I suppose those are just simple enough answers to be true.

But in other news, I turned in my new course handbook to the bosses yesterday, ever so proud of the product I created. And then I opened it up again and noticed roughly one metric bejesus load of stupid little typos. Now they're gonna think I'm retarded. Did I tell you I'm the QC for the company?

Ha!

But then I tell myself that writers have editors, dictators have people who edit, professional smart people have others who clean stuff up. Therefore, if I have a few typos, it doesn't make me retarded. I'm in good company with smart people who don't see that they drop their S's, too.

D00d says songwriters have critics too. Some will say 'that note is flat' or 'the timing is off right there'. But other people will say 'I like that song' and won't even notice it's flat. Sometimes the people that pick things apart are so busy picking them apart that they aren't really listening. And sometimes people who focus on missing S's aren't really reading, either.

But I think the bosses are readers, and they see past it. And so now I feel better.

But it still kinda sucks to know the product you've invested yourself in is flawed.

7:01 am - 08.12.08
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