soapboxdiner

Life as a curry

What do you all say we take a joint vacation? It could be SO COOL! It would be like JournalCon, except attended by all us low-brow cool kids who get under a billion hits a day (and thereby don't spend all our IRL time gloating about our readership stats or creating secret password protected sites on which we bash that sad sap journaller who only gets 10K hits every day -- LOSER!)

Come on! It will be fun! Let's all go to the Caymans. Baja? Oh fine. We can meet in the middle - Nebraska. I don't know what the hell we'd do there, but if you're so damned persnickity about it, you pick a spot. I mean damn y'all. Why are you pressuring me this way! Like you've never thought to yourself, "By golly, just once in my life, I'd like to tip a cow in the middle of a Nebraskan corn field."

Shit. Let's just be keeping it real, peoples.

So today really sucked. Yes, I realize nobody cares about the shit that hits the SBD fan. I don't care, particularly. I mean, I do - I want you all to think I'm the coolest damn thing since the FlowBee, but honestly? I'd still whine on my diary even if every one of you beautiful people threw up your hands and renounced all your abiding hot hot love for me. I'd probably cry and stuff, but I'd still whine.

So anyway, yeah. Suck City, today. Not only did Busy Body again fail to heed my advice with the spreadsheet, but she managed to do the one HUGELY HORRIBLE thing she could do. She managed to falsify all 350 rows of data that we compiled in the last two months. Now, the office has to go back through 350 reports and re-enter all the data she screwed up because when I said, "These links/formulas are relative, so DO NOT sort the spreadsheet, it will change all the addresses we've recorded on where we've sent all these patient's tissue slides and blocks.", she thought she was knowledgeable enough with the program to just go ahead and disregard my advice and do what she wanted anyway. Now look where we are. Researching all her fuck ups and correcting them. Thank you SO FUCKING MUCH, Busy Body Co-Worker.

After this mistake was discovered, we discussed why it happened.

Her: "The computer did it all by itself. I think it has a bug in it."

Me: Riggghhhttt. It's the voodoo theory in action. Because Lord knows, I cannot be trusted to know how the spreadsheet I created works. It's all magic anyway and by God, you're right Busy Body Co-Worker! We should just alphabetically sort relative linking data cells! That's a GREAT idea! You are so smart, I'm humbled and awed. Can I spend the rest of my day re-doing all your fucked up work?"

Her: Well, I think we can chalk this one up to other people's learning experience. I mean, I know this stuff, and you know this stuff, but I guess not everyone is as advanced as we are. I think maybe we should all just stick to the procedure on how to use the spreadsheet.

Me: Again, I just have to tell you how inspiring I find your genius. Now that you say we shouldn't fuck around thinking we're really cool experts who don't need no stinking instruction, I don't know why I didn't think of that. You rock, BBCW!

Hrmph.

Oh yeah, and what was with all the BO today? I was knocked out twice today by the stank that kicked like kung fu. Man. Deodorant: Use it. It is truly the gift that keeps on giving.

In less bitchy news, I'm broke as a mofo this month - what with double-paying both the daycare and the sitter as well as registration for the daycare, not to mention trying to pay off the car. In defiance of my No Money For Fun status, I've taken to spending quality at-home time learning to cook Awesome Asian!

I'm quite impressed with myself and the results, too. Did YOU know how cheap and quick asian food is? Dude. I spent 30 dollars for spices and 30 dollars for meat and I have 12 meals worth of Asian! So far I've learned and tested panang gai, phad see iew, broccoli beef in oyster sauce, and two separate funky Indian curries I don't know the names of! Of course, it's not like there is any other kind of Indian food - if you take the broad definition of curry to mean "dishes made from a shitload of weird foreign spices". Who knew that tomatoes and onions could be combined in so many different ways and all taste so completely differently delicious?!?

Oh yeah, and I'm particularly liking that nothing has taken longer than 30 minutes to prepare. I may be bored, broke and morphing required daily activities into cheap hobbies, but damn, who wants to spend all night in all those groovy good fun times? I have heavy drinking and chain smoking to accomplish.

7:26 pm - 09.08.03
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