soapboxdiner

Sweet and Sour Fingers

So Monday was my mother's birthday, remember? Mmhm, Mom's birthday.

I thought to do something special for my mother, and so planned an elaborate day of driving 10 miles to the Uwajamaya for, basically, curry paste, then it was off to her house for a day of cooking and cleaning. I made for my mother a HUGE asian food feast.

All day it was scrub scrub scrub and cook cook cook. I'm not used to this! But at the end, ever so worth it as we sat down to homemade wontons, chow mien, panang, mounds of steamed rice, and sweet & sour spare ribs.

Actually, when I asked the step dad to get "spare ribs" from the deep freeze out in the utility shed, he misheard me and got out "Big hurking ribs that can in no way pass for dainty hor d'oeuvres." Now I know, all you kids out there would have been okay with making do with the ribs. Hey, it would be family style! Which I admit sounds like it should be perfectly acceptable when eating with your family at the family table.

That is where you would be wrong, suckas. "Spare ribs" must be cut to resemble spare ribs in this girl's eyes. Get it? Spare ribs. Half inch dainty finger foods.

So I got out the carving knife to make it happen. I'm an over-achiever that way. So I break the ribs off the vertebral bones and separate the ribs into individual riblettes. Easy. We're getting there. Now I just had to cut these six inch slabs into many, many one inch slabs.

Out came the butcher knife. There has never been a more remarkable impersonation of the Iron Chef ever seen. I held the knife high - way above my head and let out a bellowing, "HIYAAAAAH!" and the knife came crashing down.

That was just for effect - because it did nothing to further my cause of creating bite-sized little morsels of sweet & sour goodness. More, it just sent large bony slabs flying about the room. Which, you know, wasn't really the desired result.

We try again, this time using two hands, "HEYE EE EYE EE EYE YAAAH!" hoping the addition of a yodel to the battle cry would inspire rib fear, hence throwing off the ribs' defenses.

Um, it didn't work.

So all antics aside, we are going to get down to some serious rib cutting business. I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around the knife handle, and I grasped the knife in defiant determination. I lifted my self up onto my tiptoes and leaned purposefully into the knife --which took a careening slide off the bone and grazed the meaty part of my fingers and thumb. Blood everywhere. I'm getting faint. Swooning, swooning...

.

.

.

Thankful recovery. Soap and peroxide and bandages, and we are back in rib business. Taking a deep, cleansing breath, I decided the rib gods could just have this battle, and threw the tricky little bastards in the oven.

But dang, it was a good dinner.

SBD'S FAMOUS SWEET & SOUR

• 1/2 cup water
• 1/2 cup soy sauce
• 1/2 cup apple cider vinegar
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 1 pound chicken, beef, or ribs

Optional

• 2-3 cloves garlic, minced
• Red pepper flakes to taste
• 8 oz cubed pineapple
• 1/2 bell pepper
• 1/4 cup julienned carrots

Preparation

Heat water, soy, and vinegar. Add sugar and stir until dissolved. Add optional ingredients and remove from heat. Pour sauce over meat, cover, and bake at 350 degrees for 1 1/2 to 2 hours (depending on meat), turning once every 30 minutes. Remove meat from liquid and strain sauce. To thicken sauce, heat to boil and add 1 tbsp corn starch, stirring until desired thickness. Serves 4-6. Recipe can be altered for crock pot.

YUM.

7:06 am - 10.30.02
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