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I Am Victorious

It could be that I've watched The Mummy one too many times out of lust for Brendan Fraser. It could be simply an archetype of fear of the alien. But secretly, I think it's just the gross factor. Who knows when it began, really.

As a child I had no such weakness. I could muck in the dirt better than your average tom boy. Catching butterflies and snails and small flying things in mason jars. Feeding them to Sid or Cybil, Mr. Farr the Science Teacher's pet boa constrictors. No, I had no weakness.

Somewhere along the line however, that special immunity to bugs was lost. Perhaps it was the fifth grade frozen fish dissection that did me in; opening up a one inch stomach to witness live crawly things wriggle. That could have been the blunt little trauma that ended my live and let live stance. Whatever it was though, those days have indeed slipped away into the chasm of my deepest, darkest fear: Bugs. Specifically, bugs touching me.

And so, when Steven's pet catapillar made a run for it a couple of days ago, escaping into the wilderness that is my Dodge, I dreaded it's freedom almost as much as I hoped for it's hellbent flagellating many footed flight for the outside world.

You can only imagine my horror tonight, as I drove alone in the dark, when an innocent tickle upon my arm unpent my fright. Loose and on my person, a bug! Screams of comingled revulsion and disgust issued from my constricted larynx as I nearly ditched the car in the embankment. From the depths of instincts came the unconscious knowledge that The Bug Had To Go. And it was flung far and hard away from me. Victory was had, and the Monster that was a Larval Evil was vanquished. It took all my strength, but I conquered my monster.

I am one with my universe and pledge to forever more remember this battle won. But there will be no more specimens allowed in my car.

11:04 pm - 10.06.02
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